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Light Up Monroe
Is Dec. 3rd in downtown area

November 23, 2016

Chronicle staff
News & commentary

(MONROE, WA.) - Downtown Monroe will be all decked out and festive for the holidays soon.

This year's "Light Up Monroe" day, designed to celebrate the winter season and ring in the holidays is set for Saturday December 3rd.

There will be live music, crafts, indoor market, local business retail specials, FREE pictures with Santa and Mrs. Claus and recently escaped lab monkeys tearing up and down the street cackling like mad men as they pick pockets and bite people on the buns.

Just kidding about the monkeys. Wanted to see if you were paying attention.

In any event, it's fun for the entire family even if the entire family is dysfunctional (as so many are) and always bickering and going on about this or that.

So grab that entire family (figuratively speaking, not literally) and all your friends and even your enemies (this is the holiday season after all) and come on out to Downtown Monroe December 3rd for a swell day of holiday cheer and dropping a few bucks here and there to juice up the local economy.

That's right. Do NOT order anything off Amazon that day. Drop a few bucks into the pockets of downtown merchants. After all, they have families to feed just like Jeff Bezos does only they don't have his billions of dollars. It's the holidays dude. Cut em' a break.

And, ah yes. The Tree Lighting Ceremony takes place at 5 pm that day at the corner of Lewis and Main Streets. Big tree, big lights. Gonna be great (as the Donald would say...gonna make that tree GREAT AGAIN! Trust me! Gonna be a great tree!!)

Then of course the Donald, even before his swearing in ceremony went back on his campaign promise to make that tree GREAT again (and throw Hillary in jail) and well...there's goes his credibility. Says one thing, does another. Just like every other politician. And here you went and trusted him, thought he was gonna be different. Yeah, right.

And now dear readers for your dining and dancing pleasure, we present the schedule of events for that day.

You'll notice here we are giving FREE plugs to Ben Franklins Crafts shop without them spending a dime in advertising here on the most widely read Sky Valley based newspaper in the history of this area. We have more readers than all those nasty skin magazines combined and our readers are much nicer people and go to church and stuff.

At any rate, we certainly hope Ben Franklins appreciates the free plugs. (A nice thank you card would do folks with maybe 50 bucks stuffed into it to buy baby a new pair of shoes). You're welcome, by the way.

Schedule of events:

8:00 am to 9:30 am - the Ben Franklin Crafts Shop will be hosting their Saturday "Sampler class" from 8:00 - 9:30 am . A grand time will be had by all. The shotgun shell reloading class that day will be rescheduled for another time. (Just kidding. They don't have that class).

10:00 am - Santa Breakfast at Big Daddy John's. And Big Daddy will rock with those eggs.

1:00 pm to 3:00 pm - the Ben Franklin Crafts Shop (there's a free plug again, worth about $150) will be hosting a "Make & Take" class. You can make a Directional Sign for $12 and/or Angel Earrings for $3 and/or join in their Ornamentally Yours Series and make holiday ornaments. Didn't we tell you the holidays were gonna be fun?

12:00 pm to 4:30 pm - Join in the fun at the Monroe Chamber of Commerce for FREE pics with that fat guy with the white beard (Santa). Ho ho ho Joe. By the way, bring your own camera. Seriously. And keep your hands to yourselves.

12:00 pm to 3:00 pm - Holiday Open House at the Monroe Hysterical Museum (sometimes called the Historical Museum) at 207 E. Main Street. You'll see lots of old stuff.

3:00 pm to 5:00 pm - Caroling and local musicians (this is our favorite part) singing and playing your favorite traditional songs and music around the downtown area. (Schedule TBD)

5:00 pm -Tree Lighting Ceremony

6:30 pm - Cocoa & Cookies with Santa at Olde St. Nick's. (No booze allowed. Just massive amounts of corn sugar. Enough to kill a large mule).

But that's NOT ALL! Says the late TV pitchman Billy Maze. There's all day Holiday specials from Monroe Merchants!

So be there or be square Bubba. It's gonna be wild, wacky and way too much fun.

And you read about it here first.



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