Thieves make big
Theft victim sees his
stuff on Ebay
November 09, 2017
Chronicle News-opinion-expert crime analysis
By Rex D. Cain
(SEATTLE, WA.) -- There's a reason why prisons are full up kids. It's because criminals are not the brightest bulbs on the string.
Take the case of the bike thieves.
Seattle police recovered a pair of "high-end bicycles" this week after a theft victim found his bikes listed on eBay.
How high end? Try bikes worth about $13,000. By the way, if you own bikes worth 13-grand that's God's way of saying you make way too much money bro.
The expensive and oh-so bourgeois rides went missing from the victim’s South Seattle home late last month, on October 20th.
The bikes had been locked up on a rack in his garage when the thieving thieves struck.
"This week, the victim contacted police after finding one of his bikes listed on eBay," said an SPD statement. "Police filed warrants to locate the seller, and recovered one bicycle from a residence in the 600 block of 3rd Avenue South and a crank and shock assembly at a second location in SeaTac."
Police learned the victim’s second bike had already been sold and shipped to the East Coast, but detectives were able to intercept the delivery and reroute the shipment to Seattle. Now, that's good police work. We needed to point that out for that segment of the Great Unwashed that remains unaware of such things.
Detectives continue to investigate the case and are working to identify and arrest the perps for trafficking stolen property.
Memo to thieves: next time you boost some swag remember this.
If you can't be a professional and take that swag to an experienced, hard working, God fearing, professional fence rather than be amateurish schmucks and put the stuff on Ebay where sure as hell the guy who owns the bikes will be checking out everyday trying to find his stuff, then get out of the business, go straight and get a regular 9-to-5 job because you'll be giving decent, professional criminals who really care about their craft a bad name.
Thank you for your attention to this matter.