Had Any Jewelry Stolen Lately?
The state patrol might be sitting on it
February 01, 2018
Chronicle news, opinion, expert crime analysis
CLICK TO ENLARGE. A tiny part of the jewelry haul from the rig of Mr. Loud Pips. Photo: WSP
By Rex D. Cain
(REGIONAL) – Working the streets is like a box of chocolates. You just never know what you’ll get when a stop a guy for loud pipes.
So there, on that January 26th day of this month of the new year was WSP Trooper D. Tolen hard at work with his trustworthy K-9 partner Kobe, working the streets as it were when they conducted a routine traffic stop.
Those routiners is where the chocolate box surprise stuff always comes in.
They stop this guy for loud pipes, or as they say in the trade “modified exhaust which was mounted underneath the vehicle." The fellow behind the wheel of that rig, failing to provide identification when asked to do so was placed into custody.
That’s when the trooper started to find all the stuff. Turns out the guy had some counterfeit bills (phony money) in his pockets.
Driver then gives his consent for a vehicle search and lo and behold it was like contraband Christmas in January.
The trooper found a “large amount of heroin, methamphetamine, pills and a firearm which was determined to be stolen.”
Yumpin’ Yimminy but it appeared loud pipes man had been a busy boy of late. But the dope and the heater wasn’t all.
During the search, Trooper Tolen also found “a substantial amount of jewelry and watches” in the vehicle according to a WSP statement, some of which had some very distinct markings which leads the patrol to believe they were boosted someplace or some places, plural.
They got watches and necklaces and rings and all sorts of stuff. Ergo, if you’ve been ripped off of any of that type of swag of late or know someone who has, then by golly you might want to contact Trooper Tolen at 425-327-4201 or via email at firstname.lastname@example.org and tell him your pals over at the mighty Chronicle (the gold standard of American journalism) gave you a heads up that your stolen swag might now be in the WSP’s possession and could you kindly be having it back please.
So let this be a lesson kids. Crime does not pay. Mr. Loud Pipes is now probably looking at a stretch in the Big House where they have lousy food and don't let you huff glue in brown paper bags anytime you want to or cook up a decent batch of meth when you get the hankerin’.
That’s why call those places prison.